Friday, November 29, 2013


I read recently that liking what you do is happiness, doing what you love is freedom. Or something like that. Fact is, I think that applies to everything in life, not just work. 

Each day is filled with possibilities and potential when you wake up. Not to put on the pressure but I am becoming more and more aware of the fact that we literally are in seconds and minutes in our actions and words and thoughts. I'm more aware of how I spend my days, the priorities I place on certain things and people, when actually my gut says they are misaligned. I don't ever want to think that I've wasted a day, even if I do one important thing then it'll be a day well spent. 

I find myself wondering a lot more: how am I going to live today, what am I going to do, how am I going to impact upon the people around me, can I change something for them, can I make them feel better? Can I please stop thinking about myself and my problems? Is it actually possible to not think of yourself? To be self-less? I feel confronted all the time, never has my mind been this bombarded by a few specific thoughts which fragment into so many during the day. Suddenly I find I've been gazing out the window for a few minutes and then I think - what the heck? I need to refocus and do more of the things I've wanted to do.

But saying that, my mind is so much clearer than it has been these past few months. I see clearly what it is that I have to do but also I can see the optional paths in front of me. Choice is one of the most complicated things that exist in our world - free will, the ability to choose one thing from another. To make a decision and then live with the results of that choice, not knowing the outcome until its either too late or it worked a treat and you're happy as fuck. 

That's probably why gambling is so popular, its like flexing your choice muscles - yes the risk is financial and possibly emotional if extreme, but its not always that scary. Hmm. Rambling.

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